life

Life constantly suprises me. I feel a little guility today. I had a wonderful weekend this past weekend. I was able to get away from some of the troubles that have followed me around these last weeks. I put aside all my problems, all my sorrows and allowed myself to relax and enjoy the beauty and peace around me. I talked with people i'm close to and spent some quality time with my family. I felt, for the first time in a long time, that i was happy. Truly happy.

Come to find out one of family friend's dog died on Thursday. Then, friend from high school and a boy who was one class below me died on the same day. One in a car accident- the other they're not sure. So here I am, happy with life, dancing in circles and thanking my creator for all my many blessings- and there are three families dealing with loss. I'm not equating losing a pet to losing a daughter or son- but it is still a loss. For the families of my two high school classmates, I can't even imagine what they are going through. Both of these people were only 23 years old. My age.

That's a humbling thought. Someone just like me. Someone who went to school with me. In one moment, they move across the veil from this world to the next. Now I lost my mom at 18. I know what's it like to lose someone so close to you, lose a part of your family. Two in one day? What would happen if now that my life is finally on a upswing- something were to happen to me?

Life is so fragile. Life is so precious. We have to hold on to every moment, hold on to every person we love. For one day, they too will pass on. And one day, it will be us.

Where have you been? Taking care of something UGLY

So I haven't done this in a while. I wonder if there are countless numbers of people out there losing sleep over what I have been up to the past couple of months. What crazy acts of mischief have I been getting into? What mishapen adventures have I been on? What kind of interesting people have I run across? What unforgettable memories have I forged in the time since my last blog?
Come on people. you really think my life is that exciting? Ha! Well, I did organize a train ride for about a hundred Make A Wish children for Christmas on the Polar Express. That was fun. Hmm.....went to the Universtiy of Utah basketball game against Gonzaga and nearly had a heart attach. Then watched the University of Utah roll over Alabama in the Sugar Bowl which gave me another almost heart attack. (ONLY UNDEAFETED IN THE NATION BABY!!) On that same token, I was one of the thousands of people lined up and down State Street for the Champions Parade. That was pretty nifty. I have never been so happy to see that much red in one place.
The new year has bgrought some new changes and new challenges. I've had to make some difficult decisions and came to some heartwrenching crossroads. Oh, and I watched the inauguration of the first African American president with Kevin Bacon. (I dare anyone to play six degrees with me now!)

I've seen three Sundance movies- one were documentary shorts, one was about just how far someone would go to protect their favorite football team (you listening there big brother?) and the one I saw tonight was about free speech. Interesting to say the least.

Like I said, all in all, my life is not that exciting. When that changes, you'll be the first to know. :)

Friends Forever

How do you live without something that is so intricately woven into the fabric of your life? There are people in your life that are so precious and so wonderful that you will do anything in your power to hold on to them. They are your family in every sense of the word. The reminders are everywhere. You can't run away from them. They are the people who changed your life simply by being in it. They made your life better simply by being in it. How do you say goodbye to that good, that close of a friend?

Good friends come and go. Best friends you hold on to. Family you can't replace. My family grew unexpectedly this year. I'm so grateful for that. I now have room in my heart for a group of people who have made my life so memorable and so magical. And for one friend who has changed my life forever.

Last Saturday was one of the best nights of my life. To see a new, up and coming band perform for 1000 people- in a show my station presented that sold out in five days... and to see the reaction of those 1000 people to the band.... and to see my co-workers shine in their respective parts.... I have never been prouder to be an employee of my radio station. It was a great night for the station, a great night for the band and a great night for me.

here's to 50 more years of the same. Among you, me and the highway.... I hope that every Saturday night from here on out is as magical and as memorable as October 18, 2008.... for more reasons than one.

Ctrizzle

In one moment... your life can change

I've had two moments in my life where the shock of what was happening to me completely knocked me off my feet. The first was when I watched my mother die right in front of my eyes. She suffered from Lou Gehrig's disease and in the final stages of the disease, we literally watched her stomach, diaphragm, throat and neck muscles struggle to work and then fail completely. We stood helpless as the small amount of color disappeared from her face and the last whisps of air escaped from her lips. I watched the fire that lit up her eyes die away forever. I will never forget that moment as long as I live.

Fast forward four years to a morning in December in Layton. I tried turning onto a freeway on ramp when a car rammed me from the side. My car spun around 360 degrees and took out a stop sign. Had that stop sign not been there, my car would have hit a car coming up the neighboring ramp- killing both of us. My body started shaking and I couldn't breathe after the accident. I saw my entire life flash before my eyes at that moment. Luckily, I wasn't hurt and the family in the other car wasn't hurt either. But again, it was a moment I will never forget.

I had a similar moment today. Not in the fact that I watched someone die or that I nearly died myself. The exact opposite actually. In just one moment, my entire perspective on life changed. My entire life changed. I saw the direction my life is headed, I saw the journey my life is about to take. I saw my life and all the glory and love that will come with it. Tonight, one moment, one smile changed my life forever.

Like I said...in a moment, your life can change. And this time, the change is for the better. :)

WE WON!

I don't know how we did it....but WE DID IT!!! 25-23 in the big house! Yeehaw!!!

It was great hanging out with my dad and brother on Saturday. Since my brother left the state to go to law school, I don't see him as much.

I learned patience on Saturday though.... that is for sure. I learned to not throw something at Big Ten refeeres and to not yell at a little kid who's favorite cheer of the day was "how much does utah suck?" (If I wasn't the mature, sophisticated lady that I am- HA- I would have called back "scoreboard.") I also learned that as on fire as Utah can look, we can also win a gold medal in self destructing. ARGH!!

And of course, I had to think about work. But, even when you're in a different state and time zone- there are certain things you just can't get away from. But, that's another thing I learned. There are some things I don't want to get away from. There are some things that I want to be in my life, in my world. There are certain things I don't mind having with me at all times. There are certain things that I can't live without. And those things I will hold on to for as many future weekends as possible.

Oh-and by the way- GO UTES!

Family.

That's an interesting concept for me. The dictionary definition would be the people who you live with, the home and place you are born and raised in, the blood and genes you share with those that usually also share your last name. But family is deeper than that. And family can mean so much more than that. Of course, there are the grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles, immediate, extended, what have you. But, there are so many other types of families that one can belong to, that one can aspire to be.

Work families, church families, sorority/fraterntiy families (I was in a religious sorority in college, and it was nice to have a such a strong sisterhood connection with all those girls) and then the family I am going to talk about.

You have friends in your life that you just can't do without. They see all your faults.... and love you anyway. They listen to all your stories.... again and again. They lift you up when you are having the worst day possible.... and to make it even better, they can tell when you are having the worst day possible. They make your life a more perfect place, just by being in it. You don't have to be related to these people by blood at all, but in a way you are still related. You are still family. The bond is so strong and you are so close that no other term can fit. The love you have for that friend or for that person can fall under no other descripton than... "they are a part of my heart, they are a part of my family."

I have such people in my life. And it took me my surprise this past weekend just how much these people truly mean to me. They are my true family in every sense of the word, even though there is no blood relation there. I wouldn't be who I am without them, and I will never have the breath or the time to tell them just how much they mean to me. They are my second family.... and I truly do love them. One of them knows....the rest will surely follow. And I will follow my heart from here on out, wherever it leads me. Because I know now where my home really is.